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The World According to Captain Jack
Captain Jack
Hello. My name is Captain Jack and I’m the terribly charming, witty, and intelligent pal of my human, Dan. I’ve been observing human behavior and have come to the conclusion that you all can learn a lot from dogs. Especially me. You see, I’m a Jack Russell and we are unquestionably the smartest dogs on the planet. Welcome to my column…
Grandma went in the hospital last month and hasn’t come back yet. Dan tells me she is something called “rehabilitation,” and that she should be home soon. This is a big change for Bella and me. You see, Dan isn’t always home, but with her here, there was always somebody here to be with. I don’t like being alone, and not because I’m scared, but because I happen to crave and require attention (Bella is happy sleeping on the bed by herself). Since she has been gone, we are back to more time by ourselves.
I know humans have trouble with change. We dogs just kind of roll with the punches. These dog “experts” say that we don’t adapt well to change. My guess is we do better than humans! Change is a part of our lives and yours. It’s all in the attitude.
If you look at change as a bad thing, it will be. If you look at change as an opportunity, you will find it. Dogs look for opportunity anywhere we can because you just never know what you will find. We adopt quickly. Humans are slower and can learn a lot from a dog. The next time you have to go through some change, instead of moping about it, try being more like a dog and look for that bone in a new place. You never know what you will find!
Just saying…
Captain Jack
© 2013 Captain Jack. All Rights Reserved
Avoiding the Dreaded Nose in the Rear
A funny thing happened on the way to the living room.
My mother occasionally uses a wheelchair to move back and forth from the bathroom to the living room, and I’m the chauffeur. As we took the straightaway down the hall, Captain Jack and Bella burst in front of the wheelchair and made a beeline to the living room, obviously in a hurry to claim their favorite spots.
Bella was in front with Jack in close pursuit. As the entry into the living room came up, Bella put on the breaks to make the corner. Jack was following too closely and couldn’t stop. BANG! Captain Jack’s nose smacked Bella right in the rear and catapulted her about half a foot and she skidded into the living room. Jack shook off his nose and as he entered the living room, Bella greeted him with an indignant WOOF and a right cross (which narrowly missed the good Captain).
Funniest thing I’ve seen in awhile. I wish I could have captured it in video, but those things rarely do. My first thought – following too closely and road rage!
Rear end accidents happen every day on our roads, and the main reason is following too closely. If you’re business includes sending people out into the roadways driving huge machines with the capability of destruction and your company name on the side, then you’d better do your due diligence on prevention…
- Make sure you consistently train your employees on safe driving practices. Yes, they will get tired of hearing it but who cares. Keep pounding in the message and make sure they sign off that they heard it.
- Run Motor Vehicle Reports every year on any driver – both personal and commercial. If your driver has a Commercial Drivers License, they are required to tell you if they pick up any ticket, even one when driving on personal time.
- Set up a mentoring program for new drivers. Use veterans to ride with them, observe them, and mentor them. Offer incentives to the mentors based on results. Now everybody has skin in the game and you are the benefactor.
Bottom line – you CAN prevent auto accidents. You CAN avoid all the hidden costs that come with accidents. And, if you overlook this part, its more your fault when accidents occur.
If you take the time to committing to your drivers proactively, you will save tens of thousands of dollars because the accident just simply never occurs. You can’t measure that, but take my word for it. You’d rather not have accidents and keep the money in your pocket.
© 2013. Dan Weedin. All Rights Reserved
The World According to Captain Jack – February 2013
Hello. My name is Captain Jack and I’m the terribly charming, witty, and intelligent pal of my human, Dan. I’ve been observing human behavior and have come to the
Captain Jack
conclusion that you all can learn a lot from dogs. Especially me. You see, I’m a Jack Russell and we are unquestionably the smartest dogs on the planet. Welcome to my column…
Human adults are dumb. That’s right D.U.M.B. (see we dogs can spell)!
(Case in point, they only just now added the highly intelligent and totally amazing Russell terriers to the Westminster Kennel Club dog show…only about 200 years late!)
But I digress. I make this powerful statement not to denigrate all humans, just the adults. You see, I’ve found that the human child is way more talented and creative, and somehow when they grow up, they lose all the good things that made them so.
Case in Point #2 – Dan went to visit a classroom of students at Breidablik Elementary school to read them my stories. I still havent’ been “approved” to visit there yet. Sounds a lot like the Westminster Kennel Club management!
Anyway, Dan told me these kids are really talented. They were smart, curious, creative, fearless, fun loving, playful, and energetic. He said they asked lots of questions, made really sophisticated suggestions, and weren’t afraid of saying anything for fear of looking bad. They were just awesome and I plan on visiting even if I have to break in to the place myself!
So what happens to these children when they turn into adults, you ask? Well, they tell me they get wiser and more mature. I say, phooey. Adults become fearful of saying and doing things for how they might be perceived. They stop reading books for fun. They lose all the creativity they ever had. They become tentative and serious. They end up getting stuck in “ruts” and “same old, same old” rather than exploring and living life.
Here’s a tip for all you adults from us dogs and human kids…
Find a way to enjoy and be enthusiastic about every day. We dogs go into the same yard every day, yet we don’t say, “Oh, the same old yard.” We say, “YES…the YARD!” Human kids walk into their classrooms every day and say, “YES…we get to learn and have fun!” Why don’t you walk into your life every day and act like a dog or a kid? It will do you a lot of good and you can go from dumb to fun in no time flat! I’m still working on this with Dan, but he’s a slow learner…
My final comment to human kids…
Your body may grow and you are forced to grow older, but you aren’t forced to stop having fun. Always be creative; always ask questions; always be fearless and never stop reading and writing. Now, go have fun!
Just saying…
Captain Jack
© 2013 Captain Jack. All Rights Reserved
The World According to Captain Jack
Just saying…
Captain Jack
© 2013 Captain Jack. All Rights Reserved
The World According to Captain Jack
Captain Jack
Hello. My name is Captain Jack and I’m the terribly charming, witty, and intelligent pal of my human, Dan. I’ve been observing human behavior and have come to the conclusion that you all can learn a lot from dogs. Especially me. You see, I’m a Jack Russell and we are unquestionably the smartest dogs on the planet. Welcome to my column…
I’m a simple dog. Complex mind, yet simple in how I go about life. Take how I steal food.
My pal Bella goes crazy when someone goes in the kitchen. She barks and jumps and begs like that’s going to get the humans to give her some food. Never works. Me, I bide my time. I wait around until they sit down with their food and beverage (I like coffee and a Jack Russell on coffee is an amazing thing). Just when they least expect it and leave an opening, I slyly move in. Yes, sometimes I get caught, but not after I’ve been able to steal a little (or a lot) of food. Yes, I get in trouble, but it never lasts. What are they going to do? Throw me out in the cold? Have you seen this face?
I once read about a guy named Sir William Ockham. He came up with some theory that became Occam’s Razor (why they changed the spelling I’ll never know. Must be a human thing). What Occam’s razor says is “other things being equal, a simpler explanation is better than a more complex one.” What that means to me is, the simple answer is usually the right one. Bella makes getting food too difficult. She wastes a lot of barking and energy and ends up getting nothing. I am more strategic. I plan and execute by using the simplest tactics.
Humans bark and expend a lot of energy from what I see. They make things harder than they should be. Like Old Sir William says, the simple answer is usually the best one (I am paraphrasing to make it simple). Maybe more dogs (like Bella) and humans can give it a try. I am pretty sure it will lead to more food (or whatever floats your boat).
Just saying…
Captain Jack
© 2012 Captain Jack. All Rights Reserved
The World According to Captain Jack
Captain Jack
Hello. My name is Captain Jack and I’m the terribly charming, witty, and intelligent pal of my human, Dan. I’ve been observing human behavior and have come to the conclusion that you all can learn a lot from dogs. Especially me. You see, I’m a Jack Russell and we are unquestionably the smartest dogs on the planet. Welcome to my column…
I hate the rain. I would much rather go for a walk, chase snakes, and bark at squirrels in the sun. Yes, I know I live in the Northwest, but that doesn’t change my point of view. Dan still makes me go out in the rain to do my duty. Yesterday, these huge raindrops started coming down right in the middle of my looking for a good spot. I wanted to go in and he wouldn’t let me. AND, he was the one wearing a raincoat! I was just still in my fur…
I ended up finding a good spot that was under some bushes and trees that allowed me to do my duty relatively dry. Sometimes you just need to be like a dog and show some ingenuity!
Humans often give up too easily. When it rains on their “duty” (things like career, family, losing weight, writing that book, challenges with co-workers, vacations, and endless other things), they become despondent, anxious, depressed, and then quit. All of us (even dogs) will face adversity. We will always find people who tell us we can’t. We will always run into roadblocks and unexpected crisis. Like raindrops in your life. Time to find a big bush and keep going.
Be like a dog. Never quit on your dreams. Always look for ways you “can,” instead of reasons you “can’t.” Dogs do it; so can you.
Captain Jack
© 2012 Captain Jack. All Rights Reserved
The World According to Captain Jack – October 2012
The World According to Captain Jack
Dan was telling me that one of the big issues he is working on with the school board is about having dogs in the classroom. I guess there are some dogs that are called “therapy dogs” who come and help kids learn in the classroom. Me….I can’t do it. These dogs have to be on their best behavior all the time, be docile, not chase squirrels, and teach kids. I can’t do any of the first three, and what I can teach kids, their parents want no part of…believe me!
- Take risks. Fail. Learn. Take more risks. Dogs would never have any fun if we didn’t take a few risks. Humans are the same way. Too boring.
- Get lots of sleep. Dog brains need lots of sleep and so do humans from what I understand. Humans work too hard sometimes. Get more sleep.
- Learn how to influence. I influence Dan all the time to feed me, take me out for a walk or other unmentionables, watch TV, and sleep on the bed. We dogs influence with our eyes and natural charm. Humans use language.
- Find new adventures in the same old yard. My yard is my regular stomping grounds. Other dogs have fenced yards. Either way, we see the same thing everyday, but we make each day a new adventure. Humans get discouraged too easily. Just because it’s the same yard, doesn’t mean you can’t keep having fun. Find new smells!
- Live in the moment. Sometimes I get in trouble, but I forget about it and move on. Humans tend to mope about bad things too much and then the bad things linger on longer than they ever should have.
You see some dogs can provide therapy, and some might just need it themselves. I think I may just fall into the last one, but who cares. I’m having fun!
© 2012 Captain Jack. All Rights Reserved
Captain Jack’s Column
A repentant Captain Jack
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The Escape & Capture of Captain Jack
He did it again.
Without going into great detail, the Pirate Dog escaped as I was taking him out. Mea Culpa. He’s a tricky one.
As soon as he took off, I knew the game was on. He fled behind the house in the green belt, hell-bent to find every exotic smell and adventure he could. This was right after church, so of course I’m in my dress slacks and shirt. I went back into the house, grabbed a large dog cookie, and went on the hunt. Barb soon joined me after getting my mother situated. As I was walking the neighborhood, our terrific neighbor Karen asked if she could help. I thanked her and asked if she wouldn’t mind bringing her dog Charlie along. Charlie is the 180 degrees of Captain jack. A beautiful black dog whose main goal in life seems to be taking it easy. He probably listens to a lot of Jimmy Buffett.
Not long into the hunt, I realized I may need to go deep into the green belt. As Barb, Karen and Charlie kept on, I went into the house to get into jeans. I was gearing up for the battle.
When I came out, I hear the two ladies laughing and carrying on. The Pirate Dog had been captured…thanks to Charlie! You see, they went into the back yard with Charlie. All of a sudden, out of the bushes jumps Captain Jack. The aroma of the “intruding” dog got the best of him. Then Barb did something very cunning. She said, “Hey Charlie…would you like a cookie? Charlie want a cookie.” That’s all Jack could take. he came bounding towards Charlie inquisitive to know what the heck was going on. Barb then laid siege and corralled him.
The booty for Charlie was a couple big, fat peanut butter dog cookies. Karen walked away with a couple Black Toad beers. Both were far less than deserved for the quick capture that I had worried might take several hours. Charlie may find more at his doorstep soon!
The moral of the story? Don’t panic. Have a plan. And most importantly, make sure you have a neighbor with another dog eating a cookie. It works every time!
A repentant Captain Jack
© 2012. Dan Weedin. All Rights Reserved
The Office
I can’t tell if this is an office romance or they are just leveraging for the heater….
Oh, the drama!
(Of course, Captain Jack is the chairman of the board, so I’m wondering if this has Mad Men written all over it)
© 2012 Dan Weedin. All Rights Reserved
