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The World According to Captain Jack

Captain Jack

Hello. My name is Captain Jack and I’m the terribly charming, witty, and intelligent pal of my human, Dan. I’ve been observing human behavior and have come to the conclusion that you all can learn a lot from dogs. Especially me. You see, I’m a Jack Russell and we are unquestionably the smartest dogs on the planet. Welcome to my column…

I’m a simple dog. Complex mind, yet simple in how I go about life. Take how I steal food.

My pal Bella goes crazy when someone goes in the kitchen. She barks and jumps and begs like that’s going to get the humans to give her some food. Never works. Me, I bide my time. I wait around until they sit down with their food and beverage (I like coffee and a Jack Russell on coffee is an amazing thing). Just when they least expect it and leave an opening, I slyly move in. Yes, sometimes I get caught, but not after I’ve been able to steal a little (or a lot) of food. Yes, I get in trouble, but it never lasts. What are they going to do? Throw me out in the cold? Have you seen this face?

I once read about a guy named Sir William Ockham. He came up with some theory that became Occam’s Razor (why they changed the spelling I’ll never know. Must be a human thing). What Occam’s razor says is “other things being equal, a simpler explanation is better than a more complex one.” What that means to me is, the simple answer is usually the right one. Bella makes getting food too difficult. She wastes a lot of barking and energy and ends up getting nothing. I am more strategic. I plan and execute by using the simplest tactics.

Humans bark and expend a lot of energy from what I see. They make things harder than they should be. Like Old Sir William says, the simple answer is usually the best one (I am paraphrasing to make it simple). Maybe more dogs (like Bella) and humans can give it a try. I am pretty sure it will lead to more food (or whatever floats your boat).

Just saying…

Captain Jack

© 2012 Captain Jack. All Rights Reserved

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